Ron attends a well-known evangelical church, and he began to tell me about a recent service. A video was played that had been recorded by a man a few months before he died. The man said that the five best days of his life were the day he met his wife, the day they got married and the day each of his three children were born. After the service Ron went up to the pastor with tears in his eyes and said, "If I continue to live the way that you're suggesting that I live [celibate], then I'll never experience any of the five best days that man experienced before his death." The pastor paused as he looked Ron in the eyes and said, "I don't know what to tell you."
and who, among us - heterosexual, married men, with kids - who among us would know what to say??? i think it's important for us, especially those of us in the church, to have this understanding of a gay person's reality when they step inside our worlds... not so that we can build an answer, but so that we can respond with empathy and compassion.