3.20.2009

just going through the motions

so God has been doing lots in my heart lately and to be honest it has messed me up in a number of ways. time for blogging has been scarce lately because the pace right now (admittedly unhealthy) has not allowed it. was just at the hospital visiting a friend who's really sick, and on the way home on the radio came the following song:

as i listened, i'm not sure exactly if the "connection" between the song and life right now is easily noticeable, but it reinforces a new cry in my heart that i feel God is developing. and God broke me with it. God is working on my heart to notice people for the first time all over again...to notice people as people and love them because of the image of God inside them. i'm rediscovering a new heart and passion for lost people, and i think i'm starting to come to grips with the reality of the Christ-less eternity that so many will spend. i want hurt and pain to go away, and i long for the day when every tear is wiped away. but in a way i can't explain i so desperately don't want that day to come. not yet.
some of what i've been noticing lately:
- the friend i went to starbucks with a few weeks ago who desperately wants to believe but needs proof
- the time shared with a friend while eating a garbage plate and talking about the commitment involved in turning from sin and following God
- our new neighbors at the house who are so warm and friendly
- the girl at youth group last night who nearly broke into tears as we affirmed her and told her that she's beautiful in God's eyes and loved by us
- the uncertainty of hospital beds
- the incredible minority that i'm a part of...and our responsibility to the world's poorest as well as those down the street

i don't want to go through the motions anymore; i'm sick of cheap christianity and shallow faith...

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