Its unofficially Official!

We sent in our pre-application to Bethany Christian Services to begin our adoption journey. And so begins the hurry-up-and-wait phase! At this time, we're waiting for Bethany to call us for a phone interview. After that we'll receive our Formal Application. We're so excited!

Please spread the news to anyone and everyone. :) If you have any questions email or call us! We'd love to talk about it with you.

Grief is...

aching... a black gnawing pit hungry for what it cannot have
awakening... from a dream in the night that made wishes reality
sobbing... while the world blindly continues on
hiding... because pretending is too hard

And yet - my eyes see what was unseen before.
I don't wish the time back.
I don't wish my story any different.

Sometimes though - I forget.
I wrap myself in self-pity and settle in for a good, long stay.
in the muck and mire
that is familiar and...

comfortable.

But, when I remember - I see what was unseen before.
I see depth and compassion in myself
where I used to see judgment and self-righteousness.
I see hurt and pain in others
where I used to see anger and nastiness.

Though what lies ahead is unseen.
I know where I am.
I know which road I'm traveling.
I know where I'll end.

I don't know what waits between now and then

Sunrise

Cory and I have a deal... He gets up early (usually around 6:30AM) to take Mariska out. (He hears her stand up in the morning and it wakes him up. I, on the other hand, don't hear a thing!) Anyways - he gets up early 6 days a week and I get up early 1 day a week (our day off). I usually put her outside on her lead and then go back to bed. However, I can't sleep - I just lay there worrying she'll dig the tie-out up out of the ground or manage to get her collar off. On the mornings when Cory gets up and puts her out - I don't think about any of those things! Irregardless, I still think I got the better end of this deal. This week - I took Mariska outside and saw this:

So worth that early morning.

Crazy Basketball Guys...

Dude Perfect raising money for Compassion International.

am i my brother's keeper?

we were taught under the old ethic that man's business on this earth was to look out for himself. that was the ethic of the jungle; the ethic of the wild beast. take care of yourself, no matter what may become of your fellow man. thousands of years ago the question was asked: 'am i my brother's keeper?' that question has never yet been answered in a way that is satisfactory to civilized society. yes, i am my brother's keeper. i am under a moral obligation to him that is inspired, not by any maudlin sentimentality but by the higher duty i owe myself. what would you think of me if i were capable of seating myself at a table and gorging myself with food and saw about me the children of my fellow beings starving to death?

- eugene v. debs, usa union leader and social democrat

the opportunity of a lifetime

one of our students had the opportunity of a lifetime last friday night at the nys fair - he was at the switchfoot concert and was spontaneously invited to come up and play the drums for the band during one of their songs. from what i've heard he made some signs asking for the opportunity...and he got it! this is one of those moments they make movies about...and he totally seized it and tore it apart. the kid was rocking out! you so need to check it out!!!

the reality of death

right now i'm reading crazy love by francis chan - and it's been so challenging. actually our whole team of adult leaders is reading it together right now. i just picked it up and have been using it a few times during the week for my personal time with God. just got done reading chapter 2 on the reality of death and that we can die at any moment. as i put the book down, i read the passage from james 4 where he talks about the arrogance of planning for the future with no regard for the reality of death at any moment. and then i pulled out my journal and started writing all the future plans i have that i could jot down in a few minutes. plans for today...plans for this week...plans for this fall...plans for next summer...and what i'm planning on for the next 20 years.

and then i looked at the list.

the reality of the possibility of NONE of those things happening sank in, and it was so good and motivating for me. none of us know when we'll die...but pondering that changes the way we live.